Ambassador in Chains.

At this point, I am a little over halfway through my list of 41 lessons God taught me in Austria. When I started, it was a project that was more for the purpose of remembering why and where I learned them before too much time passed and they were forgotten. But I am realizing more and more that these are invaluable memories that I will never forget, because they have shaped and molded me into who I am. I thought I was officially unpacked from the semester when I put the suitcase back in storage and uploaded the last pictures. But the real unpacking is going on right here. And I have a feeling it will be going on for the rest of my life. Praise the Lord! 

25. Pray as a family.

The greatest witnesses I met in Austria were the professors and their children. Each and every family is a shining example of how all families should strive to live. They eat meals together, they play together, they help each other. But most importantly, they attend daily Mass together, they take shifts at adoration, and they pray rosaries together. It helps when you have enough kids where each one can lead a decade! I have felt many powerful emotions, seeing a couple kneeling with their arms around each other whispering prayers in the back of the church after Mass, or watching my professor run to the adoration chapel in the 15 minutes between his classes. In Romania, I rode with the Newton family in their van to one of the schools in the countryside that we were visiting. Despite a few throwing up in the backseat  and some nodding off, they pressed on and the rosary was completed TWICE during that trip. The littlest ones couldn't even keep count of the Hail Marys but it didn't matter because they all helped each other. Mrs. Newton offered beautiful meditations on each of the mysteries, and Prof. Newton chimed in with little theological tidbits. All of this occurred in British accents, by the way. It was one of the most beautifully raw rosaries I have ever been a part of, and I know one day my children will follow this tradition, too.

26. Forgive your spouse every night, and ask for their forgiveness. 

Ok this is revolutionary, folks. Well maybe not, because I don't have a spouse or any experience in this field whatsoever, but I love it. One night in Gaming, the wives and mothers formed a panel about dating and marriage for the ladies to go and ask questions and listen to their stories. One of them shared that she and her husband sit down on the bed each night and forgive each other and ask forgiveness for any time they have wronged the other during that day. That act of humbling themselves and baring themselves before God and one another is what allows their relationship to thrive and be sustained. We often go through the day, totally unaware of something we said or did that may have hurt or upset those we love the most. It's scary and vulnerable and uncomfortable. It almost sounds excessive and over the top. I'm a single college student, but even I can recognize that this kind of communication is crucial to the husband-wife commitment to lead each other to heaven. This practice is another one that I plan to one day incorporate into my relationship with my future spouse.

27. Stop complaining. Instead, offer your pain for those who truly suffer. 

This one is so hard for me. Complaints just fall out of my mouth with no pretense or thought. If I'm hungry, tired, or not feeling well, I just say it out loud. More often than not, I fall into hypochondria and exaggeration before I even attempt to think reasonably about how I'm actually feeling. A little of that is my hypochondriac personality, but mostly I just don't think before I start ranting. In my defense, it's usually a matter-of-fact statement rather than an annoying whine but maybe that's all in my head, too!  However, parts of my life have helped me to cut back on this bad habit and keep my mouth closed (for the most part).

First, my adopted brothers and sisters. My sisters lived in an orphanage in the Philippines their entire lives, from when they were 1 and 2 years old, until they came home to us when they were 11 and 12. They were healthy and fed three meals a day there, but there was absolutely no wasting and no extras. They each had a small plastic bin of clothes and that was it. But on Christmas, each child at the home goes through their bin and chooses something they don't need and they all bring of those clothes outside to the children on the streets who have even less than they do. And here I am complaining that the dryer is slowly eating my socks. They've been home with us for almost 8 months now and they still eat whatever is placed in front of them, whether they like it or not. Ok, they are a little picky now, but their concept of need vs. want is far more mature that the average preteen's.

Street children in the Philippines. 

Through various and sundry experiences and influences like these, I have come to realize one thing. Complaining does absolutely nothing. It makes nothing any better and doesn't even make me feel better. But keeping that complaint inside and offering that discomfort to the Lord for someone else, that actually accomplishes something. That offering makes use of my suffering for good, rather than doing nothing at all.

28. I am an ambassador in chains. 

This bold statement is made by the St. Paul in his letter to the Ephesians. He urges us to take on the armor of God, the sword of the Spirit, and the shield of faith to resist the evil one. He then goes on to say, "With all prayer and supplication, pray at every opportunity in the Spirit. To that end, be watchful with all perseverance and supplication for all the holy ones. And also for me, that speech may be given me to open my mouth, to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains, so that I may have the courage to speak as I must." [Eph. 6:18-20]

Those three verses call out to me. They may as well have been written in a letter to Corinne, instead of the Ephesians. I love the imagery of putting on our armor and preparing for battle against the flaming arrows of the evil one. We are warriors in God's army, fighting for love and truth that has already been won. 

Warriors. The Stella kind.
(That's me, second from right.)

But what does he mean by being "in chains"? Doesn't sound like a very effective missionary. Now, I'm no scriptural theologian, but Paul was literally in chains when he wrote this letter to the Christians in Ephesus. It it believed that during one of his periods of imprisonment, he wrote this letter to encourage and build up the people, despite his afflictions and bondage. He was even known to minister to those who held him captive. He knew that the gospel could not be bound by chains and he was an ambassador of the Word regardless of his own bondage, physically or spiritually. 

In my travels, I often felt chained by exhaustion, by time crunches, by language barriers. It was a struggle to reach beyond strict travel schedules or various discomforts to be present as a witness where ever I went at the same time. But, praise God, it was always fruitful when I succeeded to do so. 

Let's chain ourselves to something greater, like the cross, and be missionaries of the Spirit even when it seems impossible. 

St. Paul, pray for us.